“Waking up this morning, I smile. Twenty-four brand new hours are before me. I vow to live fully in each moment and to look at all beings with eyes of compassion.” ― Thich Nhat Hanh
It might not be obvious to the reader yet, but ‘Me Becoming Me’ is starting out as an examination of my routein and, more importantly, why I do it. As I made a mental map of what I was going to write in my head, I almost skipped what I do every day after meditation. That would have been sad, almost tragic, because in many ways, it is the most important part of my day.
Back during the pandemic when I was working from home, I spent quite a bit of my newfound free time reading self-help books. I kept seeing references to Thich Nhat Hanh, so employing a technique I used to research in college, I went to the source. I chose The Heart of the Buddha’s Teachings from his prolific list of writing and was completely blown away. While I wouldn’t go so far as to call myself a Buddhist, I would say that the book altered my life and way of thinking. One of the most impactful teachings concerned gathas – “short verses that we can recite during daily activities to help us return to the present moment and dwell in mindfulness” according to his web site. The quote at the beginning of this section is one of them that I found particularly meaningful.
Every day after I acknowledge the time that signals that meditation is over, I hold my hands just like shown in the picture, close my eyes, and say these words:
I am thankful for my wife. I am thankful for my children. I am thankful for my house. I am thankful for my job. I am thankful for my dog. I have twenty-four hours in this day. Let me make the most of them.
In a previous religious life, I would have considered this act ‘vain repetition’ or ‘too perfunctory to be meaningful’ and I’ll admit that on my ‘lesser days’ this might actually be true. If, however, I say them full sincerity and carry on with this sentiment at the forefront of my mind, they make a powerful statement about my present and aspiration for the immediate future.
While I could very easily end the post right here, the things that I am thankful for deserve respect and recognition for their importance in my life.
My wife: Of course, Ms. Boss is first on my list. She is not only my wife and the mother of my children, she is my best friend, lover, and dedicated partner. I could (and should) go on and on about her, but the following will suffice for this post: every achievement that I’ve had and every success this family has had in the last two decades is due in large part, if not wholly, to her hard work and dedication. I’m not the man that I am nor are we the family we are without her.
My children: Raising four daughters ain’t easy. You can sometimes lose sight of what it is you’re doing and why it is that you do it. Then come those golden moments of clarity – those moments when our children serve as the best possible reflection of Ms. Boss and I – those moments when they are women who are making positive contributions to the universe. These moments make it all worth it.
My house: Our house is not perfect. It shows both its sixty-five years of age and my lack of handyman skills. We’ve spent thousands of dollars just trying to maintain it which leaves little room for improving it. I’ve lain awake many a night and listened to the most expensive thing we own strain against the elements and wondered what calamity would befall us next. No, our house is far from perfect, but it has provided us shelter, generated so many great memories, and reflected who we are as a family. I will not finish my days here, but I will be grateful for the years that we’ve had within it.
My job: My job is stressful. While my normal work hours are during the day, it often requires my attention 24/7 through emails and phone calls and occasionally driving into the office during the wee hours. It can sometimes cause significant conflict with the demands of family which can truly be difficult. At the end of the day, however, I’m paid well to a job that I’m fairly good at and enjoy on a consistent basis. Most importantly of all, I work at a job that is meaningful and serves the greater good. Rare is the day that I question what I am doing or why I’m doing it.
My dog: I recently saw a meme that described the bond between a father and the pet he didn’t want as being unbreakable. That describes the relationship between my dog and I to a tee. As I often say to people who can’t believe I actually own a dog, he tries my patience over and over again and sometimes demands more than I’m willing to give, but he’s unflinchingly loyal and never questions our friendship. He deserves his spot in the list of things I express gratitude for every day.
Having reminded myself how fortunate I am in my life, I rise from my bench, ready to start my day and make it the best day that I can. Sometimes it’s hard to string twenty-four good hours together, but at least I have begun the day with a positive affirmation of my best intentions.
You are a beautiful soul. Thank you for sharing.